Diesel at the BP

I'm putting diesel into Truck House at a BP that's 28 miles north of South of the Border. It's chilly out. This is my fullest tank so far: $105. It's getting split with Dave, apparently aka 'Noodles,' who is my random Craigslist ride share taker.

West on I-76

I'm heading west on 76 from Philly headed toward West Chester to say goodbye to Julia and Dave before I hit the road toward Key West tomorrow morning. I just spent the day getting stuff out of my storage space and my parents house and taking it to Nat's house and Shelly's house. It all consisted of bicycles, my ex-bed, a washer and dryer, and some other shit. I'm relieved that it's dealt with, and a little anxious about the trip coming up. But overall I'm happy. I'm glad that Julia called me, because it made me feel loved, and I really wanted to see those guys before leaving.

East on I-76

I'm headed toward Philly in the back of Danielle and Gary's GTI. I'm getting pretty smashed off some Old Crow in a coke from Wendy's. I'm leaning up between the seats telling Gary that there's probably going to be a picture of me holding a framed painting of a clown in the back of Truck House in the sunday edition of the Philly Inquirer. Or monday or tuesday.

SSDD

Same shit, different day. Picked that term up from "The Dreamcatcher" on audiobook (iPod). It fits. I'm sitting in the same place, on the same laptop, and I've got the two-watch 7:21 tango going. This time I let the backup watch on the windowsill keep beeping. When the beeps occur I'm working on changing the layout of my other blog, truckhouse.blogspot.com. I just blogged over there about peeing in a bottle the good way. Now I'm over here sending more messages out into space.

Emailing about hook spanners

I saw 7:21 coming in advance, and still this is the best I can do. I'm composing an email to Nat about what I think is a good starter set of bicycle tools. I'm sitting in the upstairs back bedroom. My current room. There is a watch on the window sill across the room. My watch is crapping out at the velcro wrist band. I found another one in a drawer in the bathroom. Looks like it's barely used, probably my sister's from way back. I set the alarm for 7:21 thinking that I might make the switch. This is the first time it's gone off that I've been in the room, and it kinda got on my nerves. I was trying to think of the tool "hook spanner" and this thing kept beeping for a really long time. So I put down the laptop and silenced that bastard.

Wii at the farm

I'm sitting at James and Laura's place at 'the farm.' It's a big 85 or 100 acre old farm right outside of West Chester that's been in James's family for a long time. They've got a projector and screen for playing Wii. I'm sitting on the couch, and Paul is there too. I'm watching James play tennis.

Talking to Mark

I'm sitting at the table at Mark and Nat's place in Philly talking to Mark. We've played some Wii, had some Sly Fox, and now it's chatting. I'm in a good mood. This was my last day of work at 1-800-got-junk, and I'm happy to be somewhere doing something.

Backwards on Barnard

I'm rolling backwards on Barnard Street in West Chester in the Mazda. I'm about 10-15 car lengths from Brandywine Ave at Everhart Park. I was going to do a 3 point u-turn, but realizing that Barnard is a one way, I opted for creeping backwards in neutral. I just left Jennie's place. I'm listening to the Dream Catcher on my iPod. It's a chilly night, and I need a little more than my navy blue zip-up hoodie.

Craft room

It's Thanksgiving. I've been watching 7:21 creep up. I saw it on the clock radio over an hour ago, since it hasn't been re-set. It's been another day of anxiety, but not all bad. I'm sitting across from my mom in her craft room across the hall from the room that I'm using as a bedroom these days. Jeopardy is on, and the last question was something to do with wine. She's working on scrapbooking-style cards for an event I'm not sure about. I think they're for Cathy. I don't know how driving down to Key West all alone is supposed to help with this weight I've been feeling. Not to keep talking about it, but you know how it goes. I think it's mildly ridiculous how this blog is currently about equal to an anonymous email to a few friends who probably have an rss feed. So here I am talking about feelings in a public forum, saying shit I'd never compose an email about. The whole point of this 7:21 project is to lay down equally spaced bread crumbs that I can follow into my past. It's a positive thought for me that I'm at least going to be putting down some interesting crumbs pretty soon, good or bad. I want to tell about shit that makes me proud. Brag-able stuff. But 7:21 happens every day, and life has very limited hoopla sometimes.

Asleep and dreaming strong

I wake up to the beeping in my ear. I'm so asleep that I don't even register what it is at first. My wrist and watch are inches from my right ear. I'm in the middle of a lucid dream about sifting through a box of someone's personal effects - specifically looking at a high school diploma from 1754. The box was hidden under some old boards that were rotting in the ground outside in a small clearing of pine trees. It's daytime in the dream, and there are at least a few people with me, though I don't remember who.

I'm dead asleep and have been for hours, because I don't know if I was even able to fall asleep last night at all. I had the worst case of anxiety I think I can imagine which didn't fully go away until late this morning, and now seems to have died down. I don't like taking medication that changes how I think and feel, but if anxiety like that comes back I think I need something. I don't have and such medication, and won't seek it out - but when you feel like that, I think you need it. I keep going through moments of different degrees of serious difficulty. I need to find my simple happy niche or fall into a groove that can work for awhile. I'm doing what I think makes sense - quitting my job, moving to Key West, planning to live in a truck - but it might be too much to all handle. The standard-living option (job/car/apt.) feels like a cop out when I compare it to the awesome adventure I have lined up. I just don't know if I'm ok as a body. I keep going back and forth between being able to handle my life and not. I'm having difficulty keeping my third-person over-my-own-shoulder perspective on life which always helps me laugh at everything. This is the closest thing to a reason why I got a huge turtle tattooed on my stomach. I knew back then at 17 that I would be a man one day, and I'd be faced with an overwhelming case of the serious. The turtle is a reminder from my past (I think I remember literally riding in the back seat of a car, past the Super Fresh on route 1 leaving Kennett, exactly where the super Wawa now is - and telling myself as a note to my future self to NEVER take anything too seriously.) I still don't think you can go wrong with this philosophy. I don't expect that I can always squash down my pure grinding emotion. I'm fully aware that chemicals are at work in each brain, and said chemicals can fuck your shit up. I know this. I'm just typing about what it all means for me right now. This is all just saying how I am.

PhillyCarShare pickup

I'm sitting shotgun while Shelly drives a PhillyCarShare Tacoma pickup through south philly. We just moved a bunch of stuff out of my parents' place to her new place in west philly. Now we're headed to a bar to see Nielle.

Citron combination

I just combined two bottles of partially full Absolut Citron vodka into one bottle. Someone was throwing them out on Saturday at work, and I intercepted them. Now I'm sitting at Danielle and Gary's and the bottles are on their coffee table.

I want to kill time. Rainy bored apprehension.

I'm wearing my orange t-shirt. I'm also laying in bed and wearing boxers. There's a commercial about constipation on tv. I turned on the tv a few minutes ago, and there's a cold case related detective show. I want to go to sleep soon. I don't have any ideas about how to kill time any better. I'm on a laptop that Shelly gave to me last night. I'm thinking about Key West and how apprehensive I still am about it. I just want it to go smooth. I know it seems like a good idea, but it's definitely going to be a crazy move for me. Even if it's just temporary. I'm just worried about how it'll all go down. Paradise is still just another place if you're not happy. I want to be happy when I'm there. I want to meet good people and enjoy the pedicab job. I want to be happy living in a truck. I want to stop thinking about what could go wrong.

Wii on Howard

I just got to Mark and Nat's place on Howard Street a short time ago. After a long day at work, and a ton of driving, my mood is: very happy. Relaxed, satisfied, comfortable, good. I have a Wii controller in my hand, and a Lord Chesterfield can right next to me. Mark and I are playing: tennis. Mark's got a projector, and the wall is a huge screen. I've never played Wii, and I'm impressed with how well it knows what you're doing when you wave the controller. I'm happy when my watch beeps, because I'm in a genuine good mood.

Carrying boots

I'm transferring my work boots from the mini van to the Mazda for work tomorrow. I just pulled into the garage. I have a real apprehensive and surreal feeling about the way everything is going for me right now. Everything. It's not a happy apprehension. It's freaky ass nerves and I don't enjoy it.

Almost to Danielle's

I just turned onto Five Points Road from Westtown Road. I'm driving my ma's mini van, and I have my cell phone in my right hand. I'm poised to call Danielle as soon as I turn onto Edward Lane and roll to a stop. I just ate dinner with my parents at Benegan's. All true.

Big plan camera man

I'm sitting on the love seat in the living room at my folks' with the news in the background. My mom is at her spot on the adjacent couch, 90 degrees and four couch-squares away. I've just gotten a little ranty to my mom about how bullshitty the news always is. What happened right before the watch beeped is me taking a picture of my mom. I'm using her awesome digital camera. I'm testing around with it to see about getting some pictures of me painting the inside room of Truck House. She agreed to take some pictures, in spite of the fact that I know she doesn't like the truck or especially the idea of me living in it. I just told her I'm moving down to Key West in two weeks. She thinks college is a better idea, but I'm going to operate a bicycle taxi in Key West instead. I'll be down there while it's cold up here, then move back when it's too hot down there - in time for it to be warming up and beautiful around here again. I was only thinking about it before, but today it's a done deal. I talked to the guy, and if I'm down there, I get a job. I'm not wading around through a landfill all winter. I'm just about done with that. Now it's time to make more money in a better climate doing something way more fun. Reasonable! Awesome!

Cheap RV Living

I'm dorking around on my computer. I'm re-reading the electricity summary at www.cheaprvliving.com. Click over to that website right now. It's fucking awesome. I'm thinking about the logistics of Truck House electricity. Seems complicated and expensive. Naturally. Gotta get batteries, a battery charger, some way to charge the batteries (generator or some such). Then you have to put wires all over to connect it all, which I'm not super comfortable with. Anyone want to help me out? Oh yeah - gotta be hookin' up an inverter too, so I can have a microwave or some such item. All this makes me wonder if I can live in it more like camping style and do without all that. I don't know, man.

Dinosaur Jr.

I'm sitting in the Mazda on Brandywine Ave. in West Chester right at Barnard St. I'm parked and getting ready to walk up to Julia and Jennie's place. I'm listening to the album 'Whatever's Cool With Me' and the song 'Quicksand.' I'm belting it out pretty loud and asinine with my vocals when I notice the car clock says 7:21. That makes it interesting while I still kinda continue to belt out vocals while looking at my watch a few times until it is the 'official' 7:21 which counts. That time quickly comes, and I hit the button to stop the beeping, get out of the car, and keep listening while I walk the bunch of blocks up to the place. I park down here 'cause that's just where I park. There are closer spots, but it feels better down here, and gives me a little outside walking time. The spot is next to Everhart Park. I love this park.

$1,184.60 / drugs / stolen shit

I'm sitting at my desk in the upstairs back room at my parents house (my room for now). It isn't a desk. It's a card table with a ton of bullshit all over it. I've seen 7:21 creeping up for at least 45 minutes. I'm working on moving the whole project over to a blogger blog, so I can post from anywhere with the internet. I'm moving over all of the past entries, and I've even gone back to move some of the original entries that I made before quitting for a long period of time. I'll be happy to have everything in the same place in the same format.

Let me tell you what's on this card table. A folder on information about truck driving school. My computer tower and all that shit. A pint glass that I stole from the Half Moon saloon last night right in front of my parents, and I don't think they noticed. We joked about it, and I did say I was going to steal it. They'll think that's funny at Christmas when I give it to Cathy as a gift. She likes pint glasses, and gets them from all over. Also on this table is a mug that I swiped from the Waffle House when Shelly and I went to Scranton awhile ago. I have the DVD "the Game" that I'm borrowing from Jennie. There's the empty box that my awesome-ass 80gig iPod came in. There's two empty glasses that had water. There's a caffeine free diet coke can that I mixed with booze plenty of days or weeks ago. There's 5 regular empty coke cans on the windowsill to my right. I have a coffee can that I'm stashing my illicit drugs in. It's a pretty lousy hiding place. By drugs, I just mean weed. About 1/388th of a gram at this point. Don't arrest me. There's also loose change and 30 Canadian bucks in the coffee can. There's a deposit receipt from my credit union for a $1,184.60 check that is a refund for part of an insurance policy that I got when I started the official "Chris Harne's Bicycle Business" to get a wholesale parts account. Apparently they sent a check a long time ago that I never cashed. So they sent a new one very recently. I don't know how I let that sum of money slip by - like 10% of my average annual income. I'll chalk it up to being awesome. I have fingernail clippers that I owe to Nat from a long time ago, and haven't remembered to return, which makes me a dick since he brought it up at least a few times. There's other shit too, but you get the idea.

spyware and all that shit.

I'm sitting at my desk. Scrubs is on TV, and I'm waiting for firefox to load. It takes about seven hours after I click the icon, 'cause my computer is running nasty slow 'cause I'm sure there's way too much spyware and all that shit.

pedicab idea

I just finished typing a short email to a pedicab company in Key West. I'm thinking about how awesome it would be to drive Truck House down there for the winter and operate a bicycle taxi. I emailed to ask about two logistical questions. Hot damn. If I could get that gig, I'd be fucking happy. I'm trying to see if Nat wants to go too. He's very interested, and this could actually be a good idea. I can't keep fucking around this area non-stop. Some shit needs to start moving. Me. I've gotta do something.

Pizza with Danielle

I'm sitting across from Danielle at the Exton mall eating a slice of pizza under a tree in the food court. I'm having a great time. We're looking for paint for the inside of Truck House. I'm a little bit color blind, so I need help getting the right shade of super-brightness. Danielle is good at that.

November 7, 2007

I'm in the Mazda in the driveway of my parents house. I just spent 42 minutes up the street, pulled over, on the phone answering questions for an interview with the Pottstown Mercury. The interview was about Truck House, minimalist ideas, and consumerism and stuff like that. There were a few points that could end up classic in print, or I could be made to look pretty foolish. Either way, it's 7:21 and that interview left my cell phone battery on the last notch. I'm cussing about not being able to find my charging cable, and how I hope I can find it fast. I'm trying to get going, 'cause I'm hanging out with Josh again, who I just met through Craigslist. I said I'd be there before 7. I'll call him after I get my charging cable, which is very easy to locate because it happens to be sitting right inside the garage on some of my Truck House shit that's cluttering everything up and probably getting on someone's nerves a little.

Simultaneous beeping occurs

Lots of beeping is going on, and I'm on my cell phone with my mom. I just hopped in the Mazda with a cell phone on my ear, and the car starts beeping due to a safety feature and it's absolutely simultaneous to the watch beeping. Timed perfectly. Very exciting 7:21 shit here. I also just left the home of Josh, who is a person who I've been in contact with through Craigslist and just finished hanging out with. So basically, a whirlpool of excitement is vortexing everyone's brain.

I just peed

I'm walking out of the bathroom at Jennie and Julia's place in West Chester. I just peed. My watch beeps as I'm crossing into the kitchen toward the living room to continue talking to Jennie about stuff in general.

cussing

I'm thoroughly frustrated about losing the cord to my rechargeable LED light that I bought for Truck House. I have no idea where it is, and I've been wandering around poking through stuff and angry-cussing-muttering way too much. I'm walking up the stairs to the top floor of the house when my watch beeps.

Red Lobster

I'm at the Red Lobster on 202. I'm sitting on the end of one of those tall tables in the bar area which require a stool instead of a chair. I'm as close as you can be to the host stand and waiting area, while actually being seating in the restaurant being served. There's a short railing behind me separating those who have not yet been seated. Karl and Cathy are at the table to my left side, and dad and mom are sitting on the side to my right. I just asked the waitress what beer was on tap, and was hit with a barrage of boring choices and said I'd pass. In a minute, I'll opt for a 'Lobsterita' - a fine fitting birthday celebration dinner drink.

Work to party transition

I need to unwind. I'm just now getting off of work. Right as my watch beeps, I'm still sitting in the work truck with the driver-side door open. I have just completed the task of taking off my boots, and putting on sneakers. Now I'm going to wait for a few minutes until Danielle and Gary can come and whisk me off to Philadelphia for a day-after-birthday party at Nat's.

SuTao birthday

This is great. It's my birthday. I'm at SuTao with Mary, Jennie, Julia, Dave, Gary, Danielle and Nat. We're in the back room sitting around a large round table. I didn't even know there was a private room, and it's great back here.