Fight and nonsense left in me.

The best thing I can do for myself is to ride a bicycle. Once again, I took several months off. I was on sabbatical. Drinking a lot and waking up past noon. Got a nice new bong, but that's just bragging. 

During the month of August I got freshly excited about bicycles, and fortunately for me this coincided with a lot of money coming in from self-employed pandemic unemployment. Wow, they dumped a lot of money on me. I bought bicycle parts, a bong, and a new laptop that I'm typing on right now. I also paid off my credit card, which shouldn't have had a balance anyway (whoops), AND saved enough money to do another Trans-USA bicycle tour in 2021, variables permitting. ALL GOOD.

I gained 30+ pounds since this time last year by being a loaf and pounding down chips and wine. That'll do for awhile, but now I'm trying to reverse the tide. A bunch of other variables play into what-all I've been up to, but for the sake of simplicity, here's where it stands: I stopped riding my bicycle, now I am riding my bicycle again.

I'm still tired. I rode my regular loop earlier, and I'm starting to feel my body come back online after dormancy. That pandemic money also afforded me a Wahoo Roam GPS bicycle computer, and I can report that it is a device which enhances ride enjoyment. I get to race against my former faster self during sections of the rides which I revisit regularly. It's fun to get my ass kicked by myself while I'm out there by myself.

This bicycle I'm riding... a bicycle I only finished assembling for myself about a week ago... is excellent. I built up this one, and re-worked my Roberts road bicycle as well. I have other bicycles and projects in addition to that, but it's too much for the purview of this update, the purpose of which is to simply demonstrate that I am alive and I still have a little bit of fight and nonsense left in me.

Checking in

Checking in. Doing fine. Hard to know what to report when everything is in flux. Hard to know what variables are important - which changes might be important later in life. I'm seeing a new person, and it's going really well. I'm working on finding the right combination and dosage of medications to do... better. I'm still looking at improving my sewing skills as a bridge toward a different and better future. I'm currently freshly obsessed with bicycles, and trying to get more of my projects into an operational mode.

Living with my mom has been nice and pleasant and easy. We get along well, and we both have plenty of space in this big house. I'm trying something new. I've been transforming the room where I sleep into a place that is mine - making it match my style and what I want. In past times, I have always been too distracted with planning my next escape, leaving no time to arrange my surroundings to fit me, because what is the point if I'm just going to leave again? This time I am here for awhile, and for now this room is mine. 

In the same vein, I've set up another room as a big sewing room for me and mom. I built new tables with insets for our main sewing machines, and I built dedicated tables for cutting and ironing. I've been too distracted with bicycles to use and appreciate the sewing room, but the day is coming soon, and the room is very ready.

I have too much to share about thoughts and the specifics of the projects I've been working on. Maybe I'll get to that soon. At the heart of it all, I know that I am still just a little bit crazy, and I will probably always be searching for a way to fit myself into the framework.